Benjamin has been growing up quickly. To Justin and me, it seemed like he started to grow up remarkably fast right when Lydie died. I don't know if that's all in our heads, but suddenly it's clear that our boy understands everything (like this morning when I asked him to throw a bottle in the recycle bin, and off he goes). This, in a way, is extra painful for me. Suddenly, he's my baby, and I want him to stay my baby just a little bit longer. I can't help thinking about how if Lydie was here, I would be thrilled that he was acting so grown up. It would make life that much more manageable.
Ben picks up new words everyday, and sometimes even strings them together. "Bus!" he pointed out on the way to school this morning. "Dadda's car!" he says whenever he sees a silver car. "Up," he said yesterday, raising his car. "Down!" he cried, bringing it down.
And the newest word, which cuts so deep into my heart, is "baby."